The Terrible Twos is a term that’s used to refer to a stage of development for toddlers. Toddlers usually reach this phase when they’re two years old, hence the name. In this phase, the children are likely to feel more challenging to control. It’s because at this stage the rapid development in communication leads to a growing sense of independence.
While handling your child in this stage can be tiresome, you must do it. A few strategies are using which you can better control your child, which will ultimately aid in his development. Stay with us if you think a toddler parenting course is what you need right now.
Understanding The Terrible Twos
To handle your child in the terrible twos, it’s very important to understand what drives this specific phase. Here are the driving forces behind the terrible twos that you should be aware of.
Lack of Adequate Verbal Knowledge
Around this age, the verbal and communication skill of your child starts to grow at a fast pace. Your toddler may tend to talk at lightning fast speed and be very chatty from time to time. However, sometimes it might be hard to understand your child, or the child may fail to communicate properly.
This is especially true when your child starts communicating more complicated things, for example, emotions. While he may not face any challenge asking for a treat, expressing how a certain event makes him feel can be challenging.
The miscommunication leads to frustration as they can’t seem to communicate their point. This frustration is expressed in actions such as cries, tantrums, etc.
Expectation of Autonomy
Around this age, children grow the notion that their physical needs will be met in due time as they get used to regular meals and proper sleep. As their communication and cognitive skills start developing rapidly, they start craving more independence. More than that, they start prioritizing their significance in the family.
Simply put, your children will experience a constant craving for attention at this stage. However, your child simply can’t express this sudden complicated need in words. So, they’re more likely to break into tantrums and meltdowns. In mild cases, you’ll find your child feeling helpless or simply clingy.
Misunderstanding
When it comes to the terrible twos, it’s not always the children’s fault. Sometimes, the parent is to blame as well. In certain cases, the child may just be testing the limits to which it can exert to understand the level of freedom and autonomy it has.
Then there’s the occasional tantrum that results from a lack of communication skills and expectations of independence. However, these are mostly labeled as misbehaviors, and parents fail to work on these due to the false interpretation in the first place.
How to Tame the Terrible Two
Now that you have an idea about the triggers of the terrible two, time to look into how you can expect to cure it. So, let’s get started!
Leave It as It Is
In some cases, tending to tantrums only tends to exacerbate the situation. So, you can try giving into the tantrum instead. When your child is on the floor throwing his rage around, keep your calm and praise your child about his energy or high vocal range.
If you’re lucky, your child will eventually realize the irrationality of his behavior and stop at some point. When he does, you should communicate your pride and satisfaction over how he managed to control his emotions. This can act as positive feedback which will prevent your child from making another mess in the future.
Try to Distract Your Child
As most parents know, there’s a brief window just before your child starts throwing tantrums. In this window, you can usually distract your child and prevent the meltdown altogether.
To do this, it’s important to have a good grasp of what your child likes. Handing his favorite toy or treat might help him calm down, but it’s up to the parent to provide it. So, we recommend keeping some items the child is fond of at your disposal all the time. You should carry a few essentials even when you’re commuting or visiting another place. This will help you keep your child in control.
Give Your Child a Little Power
As discussed previously, one of the major reasons why your child may be throwing tantrums is because he feels a need for power. In certain cases, it’d be the wisest to provide exactly what your child is looking for.
So, how do you do that? Take a brief moment and reflect upon the routine you and your child share. Then, focus on how you can allow some power or freedom to your child.
For example, when dressing your child up before going out, ask him what he wants to wear. Or simply ask for his preferences regarding his favorite treat or activity. This is called creating a decision-rich environment. We believe this will help your child reduce frustrations, which will reduce the frequency of meltdowns.
Fill Your Child with Positive Attention
A lot of parents tend to spend most of their time away from their children. So, when you return home after a long day’s work, your child may try to interact with you. As we’ve discussed already, children feel an overwhelming need for attention during this time.
Parents sometimes reciprocate with a negative response if they’re too tired. However, even if that means that you’re giving attention to your child, it’s negative attention this time. Instead, try to interact positively with your child. Spend some one-on-one time with your child regularly. Engage in activities that you both like. This will help you create a strong bond with your child.
Conclusion
As you can see, taming the terrible twos is no simple task. However, if the guideline is maintained properly, you’ll be able to control the tantrums of your child, and possibly reduce their frequency too. So, try to understand what’s causing your child to act up, and take appropriate measures.
