Being a single parent is hard. It’s really hard.
You might be thinking about how you can possibly be a great parent to your children after going through the event of a divorce. Now, you have thousands of dollars of legal fees to pay, and on top of that, you have children that you need to take care of.
In today’s digitally connected world, especially after the COVID-19 pandemic, it’s more important than ever for children to have strong support systems in place, especially with technology as an easy distraction. And one of these support systems are sets of parents, and when that bond is separated, times can be different.
Your children might act or treat you differently after the event of a separation or divorce, and now they have to split time with you and your ex-spouse.
With all of these uncontrollable circumstances, how exactly can you be an outstanding single parent this year? Let’s find out.
Focus On Your Physical and Mental Wellbeing
The first and most important step to being a great single parent this year is to focus on your physical and mental wellbeing.
Amidst the difficulties of being a single parent, you need to give yourself time to rest and focus on yourself. Some ways to rest include reading a book at the beach, taking a nap, going on a walk with your dog, or even watching your favorite reality television shows at home.
There might also be times where you might really miss having your former spouse around most of the time. Having this set of emotions is why it’s so important to establish a support network as a single parent, and remembering that it’s ok to ask for help.
Be sure to join community groups for single parents on social media platforms such as Facebook, or even get involved with small groups for single parents. If you might feel overwhelmed, hire a nanny or babysitter to watch your children for the night and take that time off for yourself.
If single parenting has gotten even more difficult, it might be worth it to invest into professional counseling to help you work through the challenges of life.
Have Open Communication With Your Children
The next step for you to be a successful single parent is to focus on having open communication with your children.
Be sure to ask your kids how they are doing, if activities such at school are going well, and how they are handling life. It’s important that active listening goes both ways.
Make sure that your children are listening to you and be sure to listen to your kids at the same time. Promoting active listening skills is crucial for your children’s wellbeing, and it can also teach your kids the importance of open communication.
Especially as a single parent, it’s so important to give your children time to tell you how they feel. Maybe they feel sad and angry that you and your former spouse got a divorce.
Or maybe they are happy with their life, and they want nothing to change at all. It depends on the facts and circumstances of the situation, but open communication should always be at the forefront of your relationship with your children.
Financial Planning and Budgeting
As a single parent, finances may also be difficult at times as mentioned previously.
Your finances may take a bit of a dip after a divorce, but that is why it’s so important to set financial goals and focus on your financial priorities during a difficult time.If you are financially struggling, you can start creating a financial plan, depending on the circumstances of your situation. In addition, you can also take time to focus on saving for retirement, or even upskilling your career skills to advance to a better paying career.
For instance, there have been many individuals who have participated in programs from Career Karma that have helped them land better paying jobs in highly technical careers, such as Software Engineering or Data Science.
With that being said, it’s also important to teach your children as a single parent about financial responsibility. It doesn’t need to be super complex, but starting with simple steps such as an giving an allowance and teaching your kids how to budget can be one of the most important first steps.
Keep Your Work and Family Life Separate
As a single parent, you need income. You need to pay the bills for your children in school, while also having financial freedom at the same time.
But, even with the stresses of work, you should keep that separate from the life you have with your children. Don’t bring your challenges from work home, and make sure that you can still have fun with your children, even if work may be difficult at times.
Celebrating Your Child’s Achievements
Although this concept sounds simple, celebrating your child’s achievements and being present for their passions such as their participation in sports or plays can make more of a difference than you might think.
If anything, being present during these pivotal moments in your children’s life can instill a positive mindset in them, pushing them to their best potential.
Just remember that you are setting an example to them by being present.
Know Who To Call If You Need Help With Child Custody
If you’re in a place where your former spouse wants full custody of children or he or she won’t let you see your children, it should be in your interest to call a San Diego child custody lawyer from Boyd Law.
An attorney who focuses on child custody matters can help you ensure that your rights are protected, while also helping you be the best single mother to your children. In addition, your lawyer can also potentially help you fight for the custody of your children, depending on the facts and circumstances of your situation.
You Are Going To Be A Great Parent This Year!
In summary, despite difficult circumstances you can be an incredible single parent by:
- Focusing on your physical and mental health
- Having open communication with your children
- Setting budgets and making financial planning a priority
- Keeping your work and family life separate
- Celebrating your kid’s achievements
- Knowing who to call if you need help
By following the above steps, you can ensure that you will be the best single mother to your children. Remember, at the end of the day, your wellbeing is worth prioritizing when faced with the adversity of being a single mother.
